To the State of Ohio,
Just recently you made the choice to pass a law that (in so many words) says an abortion cannot be performed if a heart beat is heard. The heart beat of a fetus is heard around six to eight weeks of gestation. While this choice has been made, I can't help but wonder:
What are you going to tell the little girl that was raped multiple times by her father and is now pregnant with his child?
How are you going to console the mother, whose daughter has died with a wire hanger in her hand trying to give herself an abortion?
How will you hold the fathers of these children accountable? Because the last time I checked, it took one male and one female to make one human.
How will you help the mentally retarded woman who has been raped and cannot take care of herself or another person?
What do you tell the husband whose wife has died of pregnancy related complications, when all that was need was an abortion to save her life?
What plans do you have in place to prevent the unnecessary deaths of countless number of woman?
How will you help those who may find themselves in what they believe to be a hopeless situation, believing that the only alternative is to give themselves an abortion that results in their pointless death.
Do you have plans for the influx of children that will now be on welfare? or placed in foster care?
Do you have plans to help families adopt these children that cannot be cared for?
What plans do you have for your Prenatal Medicaid Services and CHIP? Do you plan on funding either of them? What about your department of education?
Are you going to be willing to help that mother who will need two or more jobs to make ends meet?
How will you guarantee that the father of those children pays his child support?
I am Pro-Choice with a belief that abortion is not always the answer. Life is sacred. The sanctity of life does not end the moment we exit the womb. It begins from the moment of conception follows us to the moment of death.
Many women enter into clinics, surgical centers and hospitals feeling powerless and hopeless. You can't just declare "No More Abortions" and hope the problem magically fixes itself. We need to start giving those women hope! Because when they have hope they can find the power to make a change for the better in this world.
Unless you the State, step up an offer an alternative to an abortion, "Back-alley Abortions" will make a come back stronger than ever! You will be met with death and you will have no one to blame but yourselves. You've taken away someones right to choose. You've taken away their choice, Now give them another choice. Give them a choice that gives them hope.
Many of these woman made the choice to have sex. For many of them, the choice was forced upon them. I beg of you, no matter the sins of the parents, please do not let these children suffer. If you really are pro-life, then be a champion for a persons entire life.
Sincerely,
Honey
Showing posts with label Your Mothers Post. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Your Mothers Post. Show all posts
Saturday, December 10, 2016
Friday, March 28, 2014
With a love like that
I am LDS (Mormon) and I live in Utah. And please, DO NOT call me a "Utah Mormon", because I know exactly what you are talking about when you call me that and it hurts... I rather you call me fat and spit in my face. But that is not what I am blogging about today.
Today I am blogging about the most controversial subject in Utah right now- No, not Same Sex Marriage but Homosexuality.
One day, I will be able to find the words to explain my stance on Same Sex Marriage but I need to be able to fine tune how I feel to help you understand without offending or contradicting myself. Frankly, I am struggling with the issue.
In 2004, the state of Utah defined marriage as the legal union between one man and one woman. In December 2013, a little judge came along and said: "Hey, people of Utah you are being jerks!"
Just kidding! I don't think he said that (or used the word jerks).
"On December 20, 2013, District Judge Robert J. Shelby struck down the same-sex marriage ban as unconstitutional.[7] He wrote:[8]
Amendment 3 perpetuates inequality by holding that the families and relationships of same-sex couples are not now, nor ever will be, worthy of recognition. Amendment 3 does not thereby elevate the status of opposite-sex marriage; it merely demeans the dignity of same-sex couples. And while the State cites an interest in protecting traditional marriage, it protects that interest by denying one of the most traditional aspects of marriage to thousands of its citizens: the right to form a family that is strengthened by a partnership based on love, intimacy, and shared responsibilities." (From the most trustworthy source on the internet: Wikipedia.)
After December 20th, what did I see? I saw two things:
One- Thousand of people rushing to the courts to get married.
Two- I saw HATE. Pure hate coming from people who preach about love, charity, compassion and that all of us are children of God.
I was, as they say: "born into the church." Meaning, that my parents were members of the church, therefore I am automatically a member- same rule applies to most religions. I grew up being taught that I am a Child of God who loves me and God loves all of his Children. I was taught and have learned to love others, that great commandment from John chapter 13 verse 34: A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
Just a note: in that scripture Jesus states not once but twice: "Love one another".
I was encourage to serve, show compassion and show charity (which is defined as the PURE LOVE OF CHRIST) to everyone. No matter who or what they are. After December 20th, I felt as if I had missed some footnote in the church manuals that said: we should love one another as Jesus has commanded... except those who are gay.
My brother is gay and I love him. Do I agree with his all of his choices? No and to be fair he doesn't agree of mine but he is still my brother. For me, there is no footnote that says love everyone except the gays. I love and accept my brother for who he is, not what he is.
One of the best lessons I have learned about love has come from the most unlikely source in my little Mormon life. It came from Pope Francis.
Pope Francis leads millions of Catholics everyday. His position is viewed as the closest to God and yet he is humble enough to say: Who am I to judge? I believe that if Pope Francis can live this, so can I.
When we let go of our judgments, we let go of our fear and we learn to love.
Today I am blogging about the most controversial subject in Utah right now- No, not Same Sex Marriage but Homosexuality.
One day, I will be able to find the words to explain my stance on Same Sex Marriage but I need to be able to fine tune how I feel to help you understand without offending or contradicting myself. Frankly, I am struggling with the issue.
In 2004, the state of Utah defined marriage as the legal union between one man and one woman. In December 2013, a little judge came along and said: "Hey, people of Utah you are being jerks!"
Just kidding! I don't think he said that (or used the word jerks).
"On December 20, 2013, District Judge Robert J. Shelby struck down the same-sex marriage ban as unconstitutional.[7] He wrote:[8]
Amendment 3 perpetuates inequality by holding that the families and relationships of same-sex couples are not now, nor ever will be, worthy of recognition. Amendment 3 does not thereby elevate the status of opposite-sex marriage; it merely demeans the dignity of same-sex couples. And while the State cites an interest in protecting traditional marriage, it protects that interest by denying one of the most traditional aspects of marriage to thousands of its citizens: the right to form a family that is strengthened by a partnership based on love, intimacy, and shared responsibilities." (From the most trustworthy source on the internet: Wikipedia.)
After December 20th, what did I see? I saw two things:
One- Thousand of people rushing to the courts to get married.
Two- I saw HATE. Pure hate coming from people who preach about love, charity, compassion and that all of us are children of God.
I was, as they say: "born into the church." Meaning, that my parents were members of the church, therefore I am automatically a member- same rule applies to most religions. I grew up being taught that I am a Child of God who loves me and God loves all of his Children. I was taught and have learned to love others, that great commandment from John chapter 13 verse 34: A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
Just a note: in that scripture Jesus states not once but twice: "Love one another".
I was encourage to serve, show compassion and show charity (which is defined as the PURE LOVE OF CHRIST) to everyone. No matter who or what they are. After December 20th, I felt as if I had missed some footnote in the church manuals that said: we should love one another as Jesus has commanded... except those who are gay.
My brother is gay and I love him. Do I agree with his all of his choices? No and to be fair he doesn't agree of mine but he is still my brother. For me, there is no footnote that says love everyone except the gays. I love and accept my brother for who he is, not what he is.
One of the best lessons I have learned about love has come from the most unlikely source in my little Mormon life. It came from Pope Francis.
Pope Francis leads millions of Catholics everyday. His position is viewed as the closest to God and yet he is humble enough to say: Who am I to judge? I believe that if Pope Francis can live this, so can I.
When we let go of our judgments, we let go of our fear and we learn to love.
Friday, November 23, 2012
#23 Hotstuff
He is my better half... my lover... my teacher... my husband... my Hotstuff.
He makes me laugh.
He constantly surprises me.
This is my Hotstuff.
He is mine and I am his. He makes me better. For that reason and so many more, I love him. There are no words to express how grateful I am to have him apart of my life.
I love my Hotstuff!
#22 Happy Thanksgiving!
On this beautiful Thanksgiving morning, I found myself in the desert of Price, Utah.
It was about 29 degrees and I was about to run 8 miles. As the 2nd Annual Turkey Trot started, I looked around me and was humbled by the wonder and beauty I was surrounded in. At the end of this run, I was truly grateful for three things.
1. Mr. Teacher
This is Hotstuffs oldest brother (and three girls).
When I signed up for the Turkey Trot, I thought it was just a 5k. Then when I double checked the info, it said it was a four mile course.
"No problem!" I thought. "Four miles is just a little more than a 5k and I can do this!"
Then I got to the actual race and the race was explained at the start. The race wasn't 4 miles, it was 8! The halfway point was at four miles. The great part about this Turkey Trot was you could go at your own pace: run/walk, ride; and you could go as far as you wanted. There was no first, second or last place. This was a fun run on a Thanksgiving morning.
I decided to run the whole thing... well, technically, I ran six and walked two. But I did all eight miles. So now, you must wonder what my run and Mr. Teacher have anything to do with one another. Well, here goes:
Mr. Teacher has taught me that when you are given no limits, you can accomplish anything. I realized as I was running through the desert that if I limited myself to a certain number of miles, I was going to struggle. He came to my mind and I knew that if I just ran and listened to my body, I could accomplish anything.
I accomplished eight miles.
#2 Willis Van Gough
This amazing woman in Willis Van Gough. She is an artist, wife, mother, grandmother, runner/athlete and super awesomeness! She is the one who puts together the Turkey Trot every year and this year she became my running buddy.
She was a great running buddy and were are now signed up for a half marathon in March. We kept pace with one another and I made it all eight miles with her by my side.
#3 "For the Beauty of the Earth"
I believe that when God created the world, he took his time in Carbon County Utah. It is a beautiful desert, no matter how hot or cold. I found a deep appreciation for this beautiful creation, the Earth, that I have been blessed with. I love the great Northwest and all its trees. I love the beach and the way the warm sand feels on my feet. I love the desert and the mountains. The entire earth is a mystery and a wonder. This Earth a beautiful gift and I am grateful to live in it.
So after I have stuffed myself with Turkey, mashed potatoes and pie; I sat back and realized the many great gifts that I have and the many more gifts to come to be grateful for.
It was about 29 degrees and I was about to run 8 miles. As the 2nd Annual Turkey Trot started, I looked around me and was humbled by the wonder and beauty I was surrounded in. At the end of this run, I was truly grateful for three things.
1. Mr. Teacher
When I signed up for the Turkey Trot, I thought it was just a 5k. Then when I double checked the info, it said it was a four mile course.
"No problem!" I thought. "Four miles is just a little more than a 5k and I can do this!"
Then I got to the actual race and the race was explained at the start. The race wasn't 4 miles, it was 8! The halfway point was at four miles. The great part about this Turkey Trot was you could go at your own pace: run/walk, ride; and you could go as far as you wanted. There was no first, second or last place. This was a fun run on a Thanksgiving morning.
I decided to run the whole thing... well, technically, I ran six and walked two. But I did all eight miles. So now, you must wonder what my run and Mr. Teacher have anything to do with one another. Well, here goes:
Mr. Teacher has taught me that when you are given no limits, you can accomplish anything. I realized as I was running through the desert that if I limited myself to a certain number of miles, I was going to struggle. He came to my mind and I knew that if I just ran and listened to my body, I could accomplish anything.
I accomplished eight miles.
#2 Willis Van Gough
(The last two photos, courtesy of Willis Van Gough)
She was a great running buddy and were are now signed up for a half marathon in March. We kept pace with one another and I made it all eight miles with her by my side.
#3 "For the Beauty of the Earth"
(Last photo courtesy of Willis Van Gough)
So after I have stuffed myself with Turkey, mashed potatoes and pie; I sat back and realized the many great gifts that I have and the many more gifts to come to be grateful for.
Happy Thanksgiving!
#21 Mom and Pop and Daniel Craig
I had the amazing opportunity to attend to 2nd Annual Turkey Trot in Price, Utah this week (more on that to come soon). I decided to go down and stay with my dearest friend and kindred sister, LJ. We decided to go out to dinner and a movie. We went out for dinner, received horrible service and missed the 7 pm movie.
Since she had a sitter for her kids, we decided to go to the late movie and see Skyfall, the new James Bond movie. We double checked the times and knew that there was a 930 playing. Once we finally got done with dinner, we headed over to the theatre. Once we arrived, to our dismay, there was no 930 showing of Skyfall and there was nothing else good to see.
We talked for minute, totally at a loss of what to do and the owner of the theatre looked at us and said: "If you guys want to watch Skyfall, I can start it up again at 930."
So just for us, the owner of the theatre gave us a private showing of Daniel Craig! I mean, Skyfall. (Which is an awesome movie by the way! It is a must see!!!)
If I had gone a BIG theatre ( *cough cough Cinemark *cough cough) and missed the time the movie started then I would have missed the movie all together, no one would have offered to show it again. Plus my 32 oz soda and skittles only cost me $4 not $8. The consideration, courtesy and personal service is something that is forgotten these days. So I am truly grateful for small businesses, those mom and pop shop that are willing to treat you like you are important enough.
Since she had a sitter for her kids, we decided to go to the late movie and see Skyfall, the new James Bond movie. We double checked the times and knew that there was a 930 playing. Once we finally got done with dinner, we headed over to the theatre. Once we arrived, to our dismay, there was no 930 showing of Skyfall and there was nothing else good to see.
We talked for minute, totally at a loss of what to do and the owner of the theatre looked at us and said: "If you guys want to watch Skyfall, I can start it up again at 930."
So just for us, the owner of the theatre gave us a private showing of Daniel Craig! I mean, Skyfall. (Which is an awesome movie by the way! It is a must see!!!)
If I had gone a BIG theatre ( *cough cough Cinemark *cough cough) and missed the time the movie started then I would have missed the movie all together, no one would have offered to show it again. Plus my 32 oz soda and skittles only cost me $4 not $8. The consideration, courtesy and personal service is something that is forgotten these days. So I am truly grateful for small businesses, those mom and pop shop that are willing to treat you like you are important enough.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
#20 Mr and Mrs Orng Crushr
Today I am most grateful for this awesome couple!
Mr. and Mrs. Orgn Crushr are about to become legal! This cute couple is just about to get hitched. Mr. Crushr is Hotstuff's younger brother and because of his job, he spends a great deal of time out, away from home. When Mr. Crushr comes home, it's a BIG deal and there is so much to be grateful for that he is home.
I have had the awesome privilege of getting to know Mrs. Crushr in the last year. Family means a great deal to me and getting to know Mrs. Crushr has been wonderful. I am grateful for the times we have had to get to know each other. I consider her a dear friend and sister (even if they aren't legal yet.)
Out of respect for their privacy and the current circumstances of their life, I can't tell you much more about this cute couple. But they are loved, missed and I am grateful that they are apart of my life.
#19 Music of the Night
I went for my Monday run last night. Once again, I was grateful for this run.
But it's time for another confession....
I love music!
I have a very small addiction to Amazon.com, where I purchase about 98% of all of my music. (Disclamer: the only time I purchase from iTunes is when I recieve a gift card. I am not a fan of iTunes at all.)
I love Pandora.com. and the variety I can get from that website. I have discovered some great music from there.
I never go anywhere without my iPod touch and I would be lost without it. I couldn't run. I have a playlist called: Run Fatty!, the playlist I listen to when I run.
Run Fatty! includes:
Anna Sun- Walk the Moon
Build God, Then We'll Talk- Panic at the Disco!
Up Up & Away- Kid Cudi
Lose Yourself - Eminem
Sweet Dispostion- The Temper Trap
X Amount of Words (live)- Blue October
Shiver- Coldplay
and 25 more awesome songs.
I am all about good music!
I am a fan of Miles Davis, Billy Holliday, Miles Davis, Frank Sinatra and many others. I LOVE Opera and classical music. I love religious hymns. I love rock and roll. I grew up in the Great Northwest, where Nirvana, Alice in Chains, Soundgarden and all things grunge shaped my generation, changing music. (Sorry all you hair band fans!)
Music is a great power in our world and can inspire. I am grateful that I can hear music; that I can feel it. There is freedom in music.
I am grateful for the sound of music and the possibilities it creates.
#17 Brudder Matthew
Meet Hotstuff youngest brother:
Brudder Matthew
(he is the tall one the middle being mobbed by the ones who love him)
He was able to have come home for a few days this month. He is the reason why we had two extra Thanksgivings this month but that is not why I am grateful for him. The reason why I am grateful for him is kinda complicated.
A couple of years ago, I was at a turning point in my life. Brudder Matthew was the drive behind the positive change that I made. I was able to see the good in myself and be able to stand up for myself. He made me stronger.
I am grateful for what happened and even though the positive change came from a negative experience, he was the only one who could have been the drive behind the changes I made. He is the one who could help me find the strength to know that everything is going to be okay.
As Oscar Wilde once said: “Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.”
Thanks Brudder Matthew for the strength that you gave me.
#16 Bubba Jones
I am so very grateful for my little boy- Bubba Jones
He is a miracle.
He has cortical dysplasia and every case is very different. But he has not let that stop him. He loves math and school. He is bright and imaginative. He is honest and funny. He sees things differently and has no fear to try new things.
He is a miracle and I am grateful to be his Momma.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
#14 I love to laugh
My Wednesday started with laughter and didn't stop all day.
I love laughter.
I love the giggles of small children. Most especially when they are being silly or being tickled. I love a great story that makes everyone laugh.
I love to laugh until I can't breath.
Laughter invovles every muscle, every breath and is great for the soul.
I am grateful for laughter today because... I don't know, I guess I have never stopped to think about why I am grateful for it or why I love it. All I know is that laughter really is the best medicine to cure the hurt and pain.
I love to laugh and I am grateful for it.
I love laughter.
I love the giggles of small children. Most especially when they are being silly or being tickled. I love a great story that makes everyone laugh.
I love to laugh until I can't breath.
Laughter invovles every muscle, every breath and is great for the soul.
I am grateful for laughter today because... I don't know, I guess I have never stopped to think about why I am grateful for it or why I love it. All I know is that laughter really is the best medicine to cure the hurt and pain.
I love to laugh and I am grateful for it.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
#13 A mothers love
To be fair, I can't do a post about Dad without doing a post about Mom.
Meet my Mother.
This last October, marked 9 years since she passed away.
I miss her.
It doesn't matter how old you will be, you will always want your Mommy. She brought me into this world and rasied me. She taught me how to read and write, how to cook and how to be a good homemaker. She taught me what to do and what not to do when it came to family. She was very athletic and a mechanic. I have a lot of good memories of her and a lot of bad memories.
She fought her demons everyday but now she is at peace.
Meet my Mom.
This beautiful woman is my Mom. I couldn't tell you about the first time I met her because I don't remember. Just like Dad, it was like she wasn't there one day and the next she was. She is an incredible hard worker. My last Thanksgiving with my Mother, we had 15 or more people over. Mom couldn't make it because she had to work. She came over after work and I remember her sitting down on the couch exhausted and ready to cry. She had missed out on Thanksgiving.
I remember that so very vividly because that is how I feel on a daily basis. She had gone to work outside her home and had done it for her family. Dad was going to school to become a teacher and Mom became a bread winner. I watched as she came into the house and sat down. Even though she was exhausted and ready to cry, I knew she was happy to be with her family. She was truly grateful to be with them... even if she had missed the turkey.
She has been the example of what I needed to show me that we might miss out on the Turkey but there is always joy in Motherhood. She is never afraid to tell me how it is, even when I don't like what she has to say. Because what she has to say is the truth.
I remember the day that I stopped feeling like an orphan. It was a sunday. I had gone up to spend a long weekend in Seattle with Mom and Dad. Church wasn't until the afternoon and Dad had early morning meetings. I was sleeping on the couch and he stopped to tell me that Mom was in bed and the spot next to her was open.
Now let me explain something... my parents have the most AMAZING bed ever! Now I don't covet but this is something that I am dire need of repenting of. So back to my story....
I got up quickly and ran into the bedroom. I crawled under the covers next to my mom. We spent the next few hours just talking. In that morning, I no longer felt lost. I was no longer an orphan. For the first time in seven years and at the age of 28, I was found a place where I belonged.
Everyone needs an anchor to their soul. Sometimes we need a couple of extra anchors. I have been blessed with more than one anchor and I have Mom and a Dad to be one of those anchors. For that, one cannot measure the gratitude because it is eternal.
Meet my Mother.
This last October, marked 9 years since she passed away.
I miss her.
It doesn't matter how old you will be, you will always want your Mommy. She brought me into this world and rasied me. She taught me how to read and write, how to cook and how to be a good homemaker. She taught me what to do and what not to do when it came to family. She was very athletic and a mechanic. I have a lot of good memories of her and a lot of bad memories.
She fought her demons everyday but now she is at peace.
Meet my Mom.
I remember that so very vividly because that is how I feel on a daily basis. She had gone to work outside her home and had done it for her family. Dad was going to school to become a teacher and Mom became a bread winner. I watched as she came into the house and sat down. Even though she was exhausted and ready to cry, I knew she was happy to be with her family. She was truly grateful to be with them... even if she had missed the turkey.
She has been the example of what I needed to show me that we might miss out on the Turkey but there is always joy in Motherhood. She is never afraid to tell me how it is, even when I don't like what she has to say. Because what she has to say is the truth.
I remember the day that I stopped feeling like an orphan. It was a sunday. I had gone up to spend a long weekend in Seattle with Mom and Dad. Church wasn't until the afternoon and Dad had early morning meetings. I was sleeping on the couch and he stopped to tell me that Mom was in bed and the spot next to her was open.
Now let me explain something... my parents have the most AMAZING bed ever! Now I don't covet but this is something that I am dire need of repenting of. So back to my story....
I got up quickly and ran into the bedroom. I crawled under the covers next to my mom. We spent the next few hours just talking. In that morning, I no longer felt lost. I was no longer an orphan. For the first time in seven years and at the age of 28, I was found a place where I belonged.
Everyone needs an anchor to their soul. Sometimes we need a couple of extra anchors. I have been blessed with more than one anchor and I have Mom and a Dad to be one of those anchors. For that, one cannot measure the gratitude because it is eternal.
#12 And where is the Body?
Back in September, I went to a Girls Night Out hosted by the hospital I work for. It is fair of sorts that focus's on womens lives and health issues. I had never been and I invited my friend Miss Marie to go with me. Every year our hospital holds a 5k and half marathon to raise money for cancer. We stopped a booth that was promoting that run. We both talked to the man at the booth about the run that will be held in June 2013. Miss Marie signed up to run the race and I thought to myself: "If Miss Marie runs off a cliff, I should totally follow her!"
Not really. She was excited about this half marathon and I got excited too! I have always wanted to run the 5k but I realized that there was nine months until this half marathon and I could get ready for it by then. There was another booth that we also stopped at that had training courses to help prepare for the half marathon.
A 5k is a little over three miles... what's ten more?
I started running in the evening times with my neighbor and got up to 2.5 miles. I am almost to a 5k!!! But then.... my fibromyalgia kicked my ass one day. Then I dealt with whatever sickness that had plagued my Hotstuff. My running in the evenings became a distant memory. What has made it even harder on me is that I have NO ONE to train with. Miss Marie has a full plate and is no longer going to run. Hotstuff says running makes his knees hurt and anyone else thinks I am just crazy for running. I really need someone to pace with me. I can't seem to catch a break.
Last night, as with every Monday, the kids had gymnastics at our local rec center. Hotstuff and I both went to the oppurtunity to go work out while the kids did their gymnastics. I ran 2.5 miles for the first time in almost three months!
So today, I am grateful for that run. I was able to remind myself that I still can move and my body will not be defeat by illness. I felt that wonderful high as my body streamed along the track. My feet carried me along the blue floor. I felt weightless and powerful... even when I began to burn and beg for breath.
To quote the awesome song by Young the Giant: "My body tells me no, but I won't quit 'cause I want more."
Not really. She was excited about this half marathon and I got excited too! I have always wanted to run the 5k but I realized that there was nine months until this half marathon and I could get ready for it by then. There was another booth that we also stopped at that had training courses to help prepare for the half marathon.
A 5k is a little over three miles... what's ten more?
I started running in the evening times with my neighbor and got up to 2.5 miles. I am almost to a 5k!!! But then.... my fibromyalgia kicked my ass one day. Then I dealt with whatever sickness that had plagued my Hotstuff. My running in the evenings became a distant memory. What has made it even harder on me is that I have NO ONE to train with. Miss Marie has a full plate and is no longer going to run. Hotstuff says running makes his knees hurt and anyone else thinks I am just crazy for running. I really need someone to pace with me. I can't seem to catch a break.
Last night, as with every Monday, the kids had gymnastics at our local rec center. Hotstuff and I both went to the oppurtunity to go work out while the kids did their gymnastics. I ran 2.5 miles for the first time in almost three months!
So today, I am grateful for that run. I was able to remind myself that I still can move and my body will not be defeat by illness. I felt that wonderful high as my body streamed along the track. My feet carried me along the blue floor. I felt weightless and powerful... even when I began to burn and beg for breath.
To quote the awesome song by Young the Giant: "My body tells me no, but I won't quit 'cause I want more."
Sunday, November 11, 2012
#11 A father and a Soldier
Today, I am most grateful for this man here:
Meet my Dad.
And yes, he does look really young for having a daughter who is 30. That is because, he is only 42. Doing the math in your head doesn't really work. There really is twelve years between us.
Explanation: I am "adopted".
Many, many years ago, my own biological parents divorced. My father left us and I was raised by my mother. My mother had this incredibly beautiful friend, Granny M that I have known since I was twelve. She and her husband Papa M, took my mother into their hearts and welcomed her with open arms. In many ways, my mother became one of their own. Granny M passed away a few years ago but Papa is still with us.
A couple of years after meeting Granny and Papa, I met Dad. He had just left the military and moved back Oregon with Mom and Lil Brudder. I can't remember the first time I met him or Mom for that matter. It was as if one day they weren't there and the next they were. Everything about our relationships with one another felt very natural, as if we were simply picking up where we had left off. As the years went on, I would not have survived my teenage years without him or Mom.
They took me into their hearts and home, just as his parents did for my mother. I remember when I graduated from high school, as I walked off the stage I heard someone yelling at me. I turned to look and see Mom, Dad and Lil Brudder all cheering me on. When I moved to Utah, he and Mom threw me a last minute going away party (on Fathers day, a sunday and they put it all on the credit card! If that is not love, I don't know what to tell you). When I brought Hotstuff home to meet everyone, the day after he had met Hotstuff for the first time, we went over for dinner. He and mom hadn't returned from the store yet but the moment he walked in the door he told me we needed to talk.
I won't lie, I was nervous. I thought I was in big trouble! But we sat down, just the two of us and had a father-daughter talk that I will never forget. That is a cherished memory of mine and I know, that talk is what I needed to put me on the right path of marrying my Hotstuff. He put his arms around me and told me that I was the daughter he would never have. For that one simple statement has brought completion to my life.
Today is Veterans day and I honor those who have fought for this incredible nation. My dad is one of them. I hope that he knows how much he means to me. It has taken me a very long time to no longer feel like an orphan. When I talk of home, they are apart of the home.
My kids call him Poppy but to me he is my Dad.
Meet my Dad.
And yes, he does look really young for having a daughter who is 30. That is because, he is only 42. Doing the math in your head doesn't really work. There really is twelve years between us.
Explanation: I am "adopted".
Many, many years ago, my own biological parents divorced. My father left us and I was raised by my mother. My mother had this incredibly beautiful friend, Granny M that I have known since I was twelve. She and her husband Papa M, took my mother into their hearts and welcomed her with open arms. In many ways, my mother became one of their own. Granny M passed away a few years ago but Papa is still with us.
A couple of years after meeting Granny and Papa, I met Dad. He had just left the military and moved back Oregon with Mom and Lil Brudder. I can't remember the first time I met him or Mom for that matter. It was as if one day they weren't there and the next they were. Everything about our relationships with one another felt very natural, as if we were simply picking up where we had left off. As the years went on, I would not have survived my teenage years without him or Mom.
They took me into their hearts and home, just as his parents did for my mother. I remember when I graduated from high school, as I walked off the stage I heard someone yelling at me. I turned to look and see Mom, Dad and Lil Brudder all cheering me on. When I moved to Utah, he and Mom threw me a last minute going away party (on Fathers day, a sunday and they put it all on the credit card! If that is not love, I don't know what to tell you). When I brought Hotstuff home to meet everyone, the day after he had met Hotstuff for the first time, we went over for dinner. He and mom hadn't returned from the store yet but the moment he walked in the door he told me we needed to talk.
I won't lie, I was nervous. I thought I was in big trouble! But we sat down, just the two of us and had a father-daughter talk that I will never forget. That is a cherished memory of mine and I know, that talk is what I needed to put me on the right path of marrying my Hotstuff. He put his arms around me and told me that I was the daughter he would never have. For that one simple statement has brought completion to my life.
Today is Veterans day and I honor those who have fought for this incredible nation. My dad is one of them. I hope that he knows how much he means to me. It has taken me a very long time to no longer feel like an orphan. When I talk of home, they are apart of the home.
My kids call him Poppy but to me he is my Dad.
Monday, November 5, 2012
#4 Miss May
I am not going to lie: I was angry when I found I was pregnant with Miss May.
I wasn't ready. I wasn't in a good place in my life. I didn't want to take the chance of having another miscarriage.
Three days after I found out that I was pregnant, my sweet sister in law lost her baby at 22 weeks.
Then, my mother died. I was 27 weeks pregnant with Miss May, when I got the phone call that my mother had passed in her sleep. Four days later, my biological father assaulted me. I missed my mothers viewing and because I was in the Labor and Delivery Trauma Unit for most of the night. We almost lost her. Her heart rate dropped and I experienced deep fear. Real ugly fear. I had just lost my Mommy and I was facing losing a second child. I took a deep breath... I can't remember if I prayed, I probably did. Then, her sweet swooshing heart beat once more filled the room.
She rescued me from my grief. She became a light and beacon to my life. She has tested every ounce of patience in me. She has pushed every limit and then some. She has been my teacher. She has brought sunshine and thunder to my life.
She has never been a cuddly child but she is the most loving. She learned to crawl at 5 months and was walking around the furniture at six months. By nine months she was walking and at a year, she was running. She is one of the smartest (and most cunning) people I know. She is an old soul and has wisdom and strength that is powerful.
And I am grateful that I get to be her Momma.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
#3 The Good Life
I seriously believe that God is trying to tell me something. I know that he is constantly teaching me but right now, I believe that he is telling me.
What is this thing that God is telling you? You might wonder.
For a long time now, I have many experiences where I am walking away from them with the impresssions of:
This morning I awoke in search of what I was grateful for. My list went on and on (it's a good thing I still have the rest of the month to cover them all) but nothing satisfied me. So this afternoon, the kids and I went grocery shopping and this awesome song came on. I listened to some of the words and realized what I was grateful for:
My life isn't bad. My life is good with the potential to get even better!
What is this thing that God is telling you? You might wonder.
For a long time now, I have many experiences where I am walking away from them with the impresssions of:
Be Grateful
Count Your Blessings
Life is better than you think.
Be Aware of all that you have.
It's going to be Okay.
This morning I awoke in search of what I was grateful for. My list went on and on (it's a good thing I still have the rest of the month to cover them all) but nothing satisfied me. So this afternoon, the kids and I went grocery shopping and this awesome song came on. I listened to some of the words and realized what I was grateful for:
MY GOOD LIFE.
My life isn't bad. My life is good with the potential to get even better!
So please tell me what's there to complain about?
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Smooth Sunday Sounds
I have recently become a huge fan of Imagine Dragons. Not just because they are LDS (and I am too!) but I love their lyrics and music. While "researching" (okay, I was stalking!) this incredible band, I came across this beautiful song. My favorite line from the song: "You gotta get up... Reach, it's not as bad as it seems".
So here it is:
So here it is:
Imagine Dragons "The River"
Thursday, July 26, 2012
this is my apology
WARNING!
This post involves the nudity of my soul. Reader Discretion is advised!
To all of my imaginary readers (because no one reads this blogs so I pretend people do!),
Let me start by saying, always wear sunscreen.
I am the Queen of Deflection and if you graduated in 1999, you will understand my entry quote.
In my last post, I miiiiighht have made some harsh statements.
Which ones? you might ask.
Oh, you know the ones!... What! Seriously! You are gonna make me write this out loud!?!?!?!?
*SIGH*
Okay.... and I quote: "Blogging is the "Look at How Much Better WE are than YOU" Christmas letter... all year round. Blah Blah Blah."
The Blah Blah Blah wasn't there but you get the point. I blog because it's an out and I enjoy it. I have my family blog that is the "Christmas Letter" all year round. I blog to brag too.
So if you are offended, I apologize.
The truth of my confession is in one little statement I made: "... just like everyone else."
I wrote something, that I love and have a desire to fulfill my dream of becoming a published author. Honestly, I want to be unique just like everyone else. I brag of my awesomeness hoping one day it will be real. (I am feeling super naked right about now.)
I am 5 foot 2 inches (the shortest in my family), have blond hair (but I haven't seen that color in years!) and blue eyes. I was a B average student in school. I married my Hotstuff when I was 19 and have two kids (with no plans of having anymore). I work full time. According to the BMI, I am overweight by about 30 pounds. Which, no matter how hard I try, I can't get rid of it- thank you genetics! I can cook but I seriously can't bake! I come from a long line of women who can paint, draw, crochet and are pure perfection at anything related to the joys of Womanhood and Motherhood. They are the perfect homemakers. I can't crochet to save my life and that is not for the lack of trying. I can't draw and I can't paint. I am really lucky that my house is somewhat clean and I can whip up something quick and easy for dinner. That is if I have the energy after working. I am the Black Sheep of the women in my family. I have a brother with a Bachelors degree in Japanese and a sister with a Bachelors degree in English. I didn't finish my associates and I blame Math.
I have a very hard time finding anything special about myself except my writing. That has always been my one secret thing that I remind myself that that is mine and that what sets me apart from everyone else. Then my heart breaks to hear that "Oh, So and So has written three books!" or "Oh, that author lives in my neighborhood and is best friends with my sister!" or "Oh, Imma writer too!". That is the sort of thing that takes the specialness out of me because I am just like everyone else or I am not as good as everyone else.
I know, the irony of my statements! Oi Vey! Do I or don't I want to be just like everyone else??
Let me explain that with 4 thoughts:
1. I get that there are SIX BILLION people in the world and a lot of us are going to be similar. I don't want to be identified as a number (ie. my SSN, my employee number, my membership number, etc.) and become lost in the mix. I want people to know that I am more than just a number, I am Honey.
2. I understand that I am not the only writer in the world and I will face competition that can only make me stronger if I choose.
3. I want someone to get excited about me. I want them to be excited about me and my writings. When I see them talk about someone else's writing or even their writings, I want them to be that excited about mine. I don't share with many about my writings because I fear that pat on the head of "oh, how nice for you dear," while they go on about someone else.
4. In a size 1 fits all world, I am a size 3.... but I really want to be a size one. It would make buying jeans easier.
So I hope you understand me just a little bit more and are not so offended. Because your blog really is awesome. But trust me on the sunscreen.
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